Don’s Thoughts II

Over the last year and a half, as I have told people about my decision to convert to the Catholic Church as my faith center, I have had many people ask me “WHY?” (and in some cases “shouting it”!). So, after some thought about sharing why, I decided to write this, and schedule it to release while I am away on a 30 day prayer and contemplation retreat (returning on the 8th of June 2008).

When I turned 15, for 3 years every night, I had a dream about being a monk. I can remember trying to change my habit from that of the dream to an all black or all brown habit and white rope of the Roman Catholic Monks I had seen on TV or of the orange habit of the Buddhist Monks. I kept going back to the brown on white habit with a blue rope in the dreams, no matter how hard I tried to change it.

As many of you know (and if you read the whole blog, it’s here already), for the past 20 plus years I have been a Shaman (or priest) of the Mescalero Tribe of the Apache Nation. At the time of my life when I was introduced to this Nation, through what is now my Blood Brother George, I felt that the beliefs of the Tribe and Nation very closely followed what I felt in life. I learned the stories of the Nation, their love for the planet earth and all that the Great Spirit/Giver-of-Life (God) gave them, etc. During this time in my life, I felt there was still more out there to learn.

Every time I drove by the Knights of Columbus Halls out there, I had a strong desired to go inside and see what it took to become a Knight within their Halls. Over the last few years before converting to the Catholic Faith, I had a strong feeling that I would become a Knight through the Knights of Columbus… It was a STRONG feeling.

For most of the years 2004, 2005 and 2006 I did a lot of research into religion and faith systems. I looked into the Jewish faith, which was the faith of Moses, Abraham, David, and most of those God chose to his side in the Old Testament which is used by the Christian faiths and the Jewish. I looked into the Muslim faiths, which are an offshoot of the Jewish faith from a line of descendants from Abraham. I looked deeper into the Buddhist and other Eastern faiths. I looked into the Orthodox Catholic cult. (Cult to me is not a bad word in this case, all religions are cults in the original sense of the word. It is only “today” that cult has a bad meaning behind it, and wrongly so in my eyes. SOME cults are bad, some aren’t, and all religions are, by definition a cult.) I looked into the various Protestant church, especially the Methodist, which is what I was raised as until I turned 20ish.

In all of this research, I read at the Bible. (I didn’t REALLY start reading it until January of last year when I finally settled down and began studying the Catholic Church under Father Francis at Saint Henry Roman Catholic Church in Pompano Beach Florida.) In my readings, I found that I was leaning more and more towards the Catholic Church, as I was getting the feelings inside me that it was the Church that was initially founded on the actions and words of Jesus Christ, who I was earnestly coming to believe was the Messiah foretold in the Old Testament in no uncertain terms.

As I looked at the various Protestant Christian systems out there here in the US, I found that each had be created by someone that had been wronged or didn’t like something that was happening in the Roman Catholic Church, which they were a member of. For example, the Methodist Church, which I was most familiar with was created by John Wesley, who was originally a Priest with the Anglican (or Church of England) Church, but had a desire to make changes, which the Church did not accept. So, he split off and formed the Methodist Church. (A lot more than that happened, and lead to the split, but that’s a rough, and I do mean rough, summation of it!)

The same appears to be true for most of the other Christian faith systems.

While I do not believe that the Roman Catholic Church is infallible, I do believe that PEOPLE within the Church, including Priest, have made some bad choices, probably listening to themselves, and not open up to the Word of God, and done some wrong things. I do feel that Jesus appointed Peter to lead Jesus’ flock in the pursuit of love and the will of God. I do feel that he assigned the other Apostles of Christ to create the basis of the “leadership” of the Church, or the Bishops. I do believe that the Pope sits in the position of the first Pope, Saint Peter.

I do not believe that the Pope is infallible, but then again, nor does the Roman Catholic Church, contrary to the popular belief of others! I do believe that a good Pope will listen to his Flock as well as to God through Prayer, reading the Word, and consultation with his fellow Bishops.

In my research, I feel, strongly, in my heart that the over all dogma of the Roman Catholic Church is correct and follows the intent and Word of the Bible. I like that it is one of the few Churches that has services seven days a week. That the Priest are dedicated to the Church and do not work in any other capacity. (Yes, some teach, some work in offices, etc., but in all cases, they are religious related postings.) That you can go to any Mass/Service on the same day anywhere in the World and know what is happening and know in advance what is being read and said (minus the Homily or “speech” by the Priest, which is always individual for the most part). That over a three year period, if you go to Mass seven days a week, you will have had the entire Bible read to you and explained to you. (Many of the Protestant Church get fixed on one or two or three Books in the Bible and go back to the often through out the year, and they leave out books that they don’t understand or like or ….)

Upon looking at the various faith systems out there, I felt a sense of relief as I grew closer and closer to converting to the Roman Catholic Church and the few times I moved in directions towards other faiths, I felt a sadness of heart. At each point this past year, as I was accepted as a Postulate with the Order of Brothers and Sisters of Reconciliation last year, as I was accepted into and confirmed in the Catholic Church earlier this year , and as the Order accepted the past year as my Novitiate year and accepted my initial Vows as a Full Religious Brother/Friar in the Order, I felt that relief intensify.

As I go to the Eucharistic Mass daily, participate in the rituals and readings, help others settle their issues with the Lord, pray daily and often in a day, I feel more and more that I have done the right thing in life.

Over the last few weeks I’ve heard several comments from people that they have heard people speaking in tongues through the Divine Will of God. When these people are “speaking in tongues”, they are speaking in gibberish to those listening and no one knows what is being said. Often the speaker seems to be in a trance and when they are done, they say that God was directing them and what they had to say.

Now, I’ve read the Bible now a few times. And it does in fact talk about speaking in tongues. But this is how I read that part of the Bible. When the Disciples were talking to the Masses, they spoke in their native language, but each listener heard it in theirs. For example:

I am a native English (ok American English for those Brits that may be reading this) speaking/listening person.
The person to my right is Spanish speaking.
The person to my left is German speaking.
You, the speaker are Russian speaking.

None of us speak the other’s language. When you speak, you speak in Russian, I hear it in English, the person to my right hears it in Spanish and the person on my left hears it in German.

THIS is speaking in tongues! When God wants someone to speak on His behalf, I’m pretty sure He wants EVERYONE to understand what is being said, not just the speaker… In Acts 2:7-8 it is said: “And they were all amazed and marveled, saying one to another, Behold, are not all these which speak Galileans? And how hear we every man in our own tongue, wherein we were born?” This leads me to more and more believe that when God speaks to us through others He wants us to understand Him.

When I hear someone “Speaking in Tongues” via gibberish, I automatically start walking away, as it is far from real in my eyes and ears.

I had someone tell me that I needed to have an Exorcism because I use to follow the Apache belief system and now follow the Roman Catholic faith system (for the rest of my life…). This floored me and took me back in a big way!

I tried to explain to the lady that the North American Natives followed God, pre-Jesus, just like the Christians did. They just didn’t know Jesus as Jesus didn’t make himself known in what is now called the States… So, to give each of you a bit more information about the belief system of the Apache nation as I understand it, I present this:

Yes, I would like to tell you about Shamanism as it applies to the Native Americans. It can be and is different for those overseas that are called Shaman though! Shamanism was a name “tagged” to the those that lead a belief system different than the “tagger”. The Indians call the person Wakan, which roughly translates to Blessed. Wakan Tanka is “The Blessed Spirit” or “The Great Spirit”, which is personified in Father Sky and Mother Earth, as created by “Wakan Tanka”.

In the Nations, a Wakan/Shaman is a “Holy Man” or “Priest” to the Nation. They are the Keepers of the History of the Nation and “the world” as they knew it. The Native Americans of the old days, and even today some are thought to, at least those I have had close dealings with over the years, are strong believers that Wakan Tanka talked to the Wakan (Shaman) and helped them understand illnesses and how to cure them, provided them with the History of the world, which by the way included the parting of the waters, the Great Flood, and many other stories of the Jewish and Christian Bibles, and ways on how to live. Most nations started out as very peaceful, but there was always the rivalries and “stealing of women and horses” to grow and improve the Nation. Most of the Nations were very animal and nature oriented.

Near the end of 1800s and early 1900s, the Wakan in most nations became less a “physical healer” and tried to spend more of their efforts on the “spiritual” healing side of getting the Nations to go back to Peace taking care of their lands, animals, and crops, which the “White Man” had taught them how to raise.

One of their early stories talks about how after the Great Flood, Wakan Tanka split the peoples up and moved them all over the world. The Nations (of North and South America) were one of the “prized people” with whom Wakan Tanka went with in Peace. Aside from inter-Nation horse stealing and spouse stealing, until the early 1800s most of the nations were peaceful. In the early 1800 the Apache Nation as well as other Nations wanted to travel more broadly around the Northern Continent and the other Nations did not want it, so the Apaches began fighting stronger battles to expand their
nomadic way of life. As they grew into new areas, they would leave a Tribe behind to “watch over that area”, typically a water hole or grazing area. The Tribe I was associated with is the Mescalero Tribe of the Apache Nation, which was based out of New Mexico in the mountains, which had a great elk and deer herd, as well as a great water source. This tribe was less nomadic, but did provide warriors for the Nomads.

If you look DEEPLY into the Apache Nation belief system, you will find that they believe that Wakan Tanka, by way of nature through the animals and plants teaches them how to get along in life. They fought for what was theirs, but in most cases would rather live in peace. Very similar to the Catholic Church over the years in protecting our (I’m Catholic now) belief system.

A Wakan of the Nations job is to “preach” the Stories of the Nation to his or her People, to remind them of what the Great Spirit wants them to do, which is to live in peace and harmony with those around them. This is done in Sweat Lodges, where the “sins” are washed off in steam, at campfires in dance, and on “Journeys”. In the Old days the Journey consisted of living on the land for up to a year, learning how to survive in the Great Spirit’s world.

To somewhat equate that to the Catholic Church, you have the Church building where we gather and sing and pray to God. In the Sweat Lodge, you chant and pray to the Great Spirit. Some of the chants of the Nation are actually very similar to the Psalms, but the names are different, and the “location” is different. Many of the songs deal with great harvest, strong herds, and strong Nations.

Part of the reason that the Christian Churches condemned the Native American Belief system was they were not familiar with it, and would not nor did not take the time to understand it. (Now mind you, if they had sat down and learned about the Ways, they still might have condemned it, but we will never really know…) When these “heathens” came to their camps dressed in loin clothes, carrying crude weapons, offering peace, the “immigrants” were initially frightened. The “Red Man” helped them get over the fright, and for a short time there was Peace. “White Man” wanted to grow out and take over more land, and the Indians did not want to give up their lands. Strife grew and the “White Man” became more negative about the “Red Man”, which was not a name given to the skin color, which was more a dark brown, but to the way the Indians live in a communal way, to include their faith and belief system. This same happens now with “unknown” faiths, and even “known” faiths that are different.

The other “Shamanistc” faiths are another story and I would not be able to describe them or answer the question there.

It goes to show how closed people are to what they don’t know.

I recently started watching news again, something I have not done in several years for various reasons, via the web. I am finding why I stopped watching news before has not gotten any better, and is probably worse now.

In every news event I watched, all I saw was a STRONG, one side presentation against anything to do with the Republicans, or a VERY strong presentation for the Democrats. I watched one “Today” event where the host tried to “railroad” the GOP representative for his take on the Craig event, and wouldn’t let the guy answer the question, unless the answer was what he wanted to hear. The guy held his own though and put the Host into his place.

What happened to the time where the press was SUPPOSED to post BOTH sides of the story WITHOUT taking sides? Yes, I understand that the news people have sides, and yes, I think they have the right to say their side AS WELL, but that has not been happening.

There are some Republican talk show host that do just as bad!

BOTH political parties are on the wrong track, both calling the kettle black, when they are just as black (no racial slur there, we’re talking about a cooking pot!!)!! Come on folks, play it straight, have equal requirements for both parties, quit calling the other side a lier if you are lying, which most are, and let’s ALL start telling the truth, doing the right thing, and make this country the great country it use to be. (Don’t get me wrong, we’re still better than most countries out there!)

The United States is quickly trying to go the way of the Roman Empire! Wake up folks, smell the decrease of our fame!

IF ANYONE out there actually pays attention to this blog, over the last few days you have seen some pretty quick changes to what I am currently reading. I figured I should tell you why that is happening.

The first book I had put up as being read was . After starting this, during some of my studies in Catholicism, I came upon and . These too books I ordered from the local library early this week. Surprisingly they came in the next day! So, I started reading “Holy Teaching”, and placed “I would Follow Jesus” back in the “to read” pile.

I had also ordered and one other on Saints. “Lives” came in yesterday, the other one hasn’t come in yet.

After reading the first couple of chapters of “Holy Teaching”, I felt that I needed to read “Summa Theologica” first, then come back to where I left off in “Holy Teaching”, which summarizes “Summa Theologica”, so I picked up the Saints book and am now reading it. I am awaiting Book 1, 2, 4, and 5 of the “Summa Theologica” book, as they only sent me Book 3 for some reason.

So, I will finish this Saint book, then follow up, it should be here by then, the second one, and then start on “Summa” as it should be fully here. (Unless you want to buy for my Birthday (which is Monday, shameless plug) “Summa”, which I would like to own. You can find it wish list at Amazon! (ANYTHING on the list is cool for the BDay.)

Happy reading!!

For the past two years I have been digging deep into my “religous” belief system. For the past 27 years, I have been an active, mostly, Shaman. This changed as of February of this year.

For various reasons, I am converting to Catholicism, which due to my bad timing will not be 100% until Holy Week (Easter Week) of 2008.

Well, it may not be “bad timing”, it just means I have more time to more fully understand and embrace my change in faith and understanding of spirituality and religion. I have a lot of new things to learn, and in some cases re-learn.

During the last three months I have started that learning, including reading the New American Bible, which is the current preferred Bible of the Catholic Church in the US. I had thought that all “Bibles” were pretty much the same in content, but was surprised to find out that the Catholic Bible has a few extra books in it!

This has been an interesting and rewarding experience for me on many levels.

Enjoy life!

I had the pleasure of meeting Ron Miller, the Author of a few weeks ago. During that meeting, we talked a bit, but not a whole lot. At the end of our time together, he gave me an autographed copy of his book.

I will be honest, I took it with some apprehension, as I’m not strong on history or religion and felt this book was a lot of both subjects.
Ron did such a GREAT job putting this book together, that neither of those topics were an issue for me!! I literally did not want to put this book down. (I had to several times, for the finishing of and defense of my Dissertation, travel for meetings, and work in general.) I finally finished it on my trip to Seattle this past weekend, and enjoyed it immensely!

Ron has a great writing style, and is able to tell a great story of his adventures and search for his inner meaning!

The story line is about his travels around the world, looking for the meaning of life as it pretains to him. He recounts his adventures, scary times, fun times, and the meeting of “long lost” family members. During his adventures he found that other countries, while harsh in many cases, are as harsh as he thought they would be, which kinda mimics my findings.

I HIGHLY recommend this book to on and all!!

Well,

I didn’t post my goals for this past year, but they were basically:

1. Lose weight, with the over all goal being 210lbs, from a starting weight of about 300lbs.
Status: Down to 248 as of last night.
2. Raise $500K for the company I run, Interactive Digital Multimedia, Inc.
Status: We have raise $100K, and the rest is pending on a certain event happening, which SHOULD be ANY day now (although I’ve been saying that since June…).
3. Exchange my Jeep for a car that is more business like, and better of fuel
Status: Friday of last week, I acquired said car. (Once I get my camera found, I will take a picture of it, or two, and post it here on the blog, with the details. )
4. Write a book.
Status: Well, I wrote a few paragraphs on it… Not happy with myself on this one, if I SIT DOWN AND DO IT, it will get done. I have it pretty well mapped out in my brain, and actually have two books worked out. Just need to buckel down and do it!

Goals for 2007

1. Continue the march to 210 lbs, hitting it this year.
2. WRITE the first book, and start, if not finish, the second book, getting the first published by Interactive Digital Multimedia, Inc.
3. Re-establish some connections from the past.